Helen SpringallSep 7, 2011 10:46 PM Interesting poem. Passionate. The tone reminds me of a rap. Interesting (but not pleasant) choice of words. I wonder why you chose those two in particular? Reply
lokriSep 10, 2011 04:58 AM I Liked the break in line four with what seemed like a slightly old fashioned and traditional piece of poetry - it was surprising and hence the more powerful. Interesting also that you change from rhyme to none at all. Reply
Donna (Dona) Ngan TranSep 11, 2011 01:55 PM I love your style haha :) Reply
KristianSep 12, 2011 12:22 PM Great anger. Love poems with angry and powerful emotions :-) Reply
BentSep 12, 2011 12:43 PM A bit of gangsta? Or goth? Or both..?
I think 'want' in line two should be 'won't', no..? Reply
MariaDec 12, 2011 03:02 AM Short, yet very concise and strictly to the point. The mixture of old-fashion with modern day curse words is put together very well and in some odd and unfathomable way makes it more easy to relate to. I really enjoyed this!
Hi Kris! Love this! Funny and aggressive at the same time. :)
SvarSletHelen SpringallSep 7, 2011 10:46 PM
SvarSletInteresting poem. Passionate. The tone reminds me of a rap. Interesting (but not pleasant) choice of words. I wonder why you chose those two in particular?
Reply
lokriSep 10, 2011 04:58 AM
I Liked the break in line four with what seemed like a slightly old fashioned and traditional piece of poetry - it was surprising and hence the more powerful. Interesting also that you change from rhyme to none at all.
Reply
Donna (Dona) Ngan TranSep 11, 2011 01:55 PM
I love your style haha :)
Reply
KristianSep 12, 2011 12:22 PM
Great anger. Love poems with angry and powerful emotions :-)
Reply
BentSep 12, 2011 12:43 PM
A bit of gangsta? Or goth? Or both..?
I think 'want' in line two should be 'won't', no..?
Reply
MariaDec 12, 2011 03:02 AM
Short, yet very concise and strictly to the point.
The mixture of old-fashion with modern day curse words is put together very well and in some odd and unfathomable way makes it more easy to relate to. I really enjoyed this!